I have learned many things this week, that are hurtful, hard, gross, and many other things. As the devil has been instructing these past few weeks and pulling me in the wrong direction, God has astonishingly been pulling right back. I imagine God's heart is broken for the the holes I have dug. I cannot imagine how after all I have done that God can still love me so much. I am dirty and sinful and yet God will still love me unconditionally. This love is not just any love it is a love more powerful than a thousand armies, it is a love more beautiful than Mila Kunis, it is a love that is breathtaking. My mistakes keep on coming and God says to me, "Cassie, you are precious to Me and I will never let go of you." This week has been especially eye opening, I have seen that I am very selfish. That word is not something I want to classify myself as but hey it is so truthful and yes I may be a bit hard on myself sometimes but I speak truth. In my sin I have dug a huge hole into the earth that is allowing me to be closer to the devil than ever. This frightens me. I have been struggling and unsure why at this point. I have been putting my needs above others I love and being bitter towards many. I have gossiped and been awfully selfish. I am hurt. I am ashamed. One thing I do know through all of these struggles I have experienced is that I am done throwing myself a "pity party". After just two short days of thinking of what friends have told me and sincere prayer opportunities, I am intently searching for God. It is dark in my head and I cannot quick picture God at this time but I know He is there waiting for me. God has shown me that I don't have to let the devil pull me into his dark pit of hell, there is another way, a great way. God's way is magical, astonishing, beautiful, prosperous, awakening, musical, and so loving. I choose God. I do not choose shame or pride. I choose God. "You call me out above the waters The great unknown where feet may fail. And there I find you in the mystery In Oceans deep My faith will stand" - Oceans by Hillsong
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Let us Seek the Grandest Adventures Together my Friend.
I heard the roar of the lion of Judah Archives
June 2017
Categories
|